So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
