Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
