remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
