you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
