3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
