your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
