Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
