I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
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