Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
did you just send me my own nude
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
