Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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