I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
