He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
