I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
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