You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
