We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
