im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
