Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize