if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Randomize
