Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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