there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
