I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
thus making me awesome and them whores
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
