It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize