I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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