Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
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