Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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