his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
