My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
