I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize