Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
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