We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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