He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
