i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Randomize
