She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
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