Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
