You really coming over, don't trick.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
