i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
