I wannas sexs uuuuu
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
