Me. At least after what I've been through.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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