Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
