these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
the liver wants what the liver wants
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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