You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Randomize
