i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
