haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
