Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
