Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
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