Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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