Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
