you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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