I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
