Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
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