His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
